How do I tell my family that I became a Muslim? GOODNESS
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
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Often, this is a case to be treated with care. We can not offer any precise statement, as the way you treat your family to this issue depends on several factors: your age, your community, your relationship with your family, your previous religious experiences ...
is perhaps the hardest thing to do as a Muslim to touch you again. For many people it is a possibility of opening old wounds, risk of hurting the feelings of both sides and threatening to destroy family relationships.
For others not, because they know they will be accepted by their parents, brothers and other family members unconditionally. Ma Sha Allah. For Teens
my advice will be different from that adults give to independent and even married. In Sha Allah we will first case of young people who still live with their parents.
Tips for Teens
Often, this is a case to be treated with care. We can not offer any precise statement, as the way you treat your family to this issue depends on several factors: your age, your community, your relationship with your family, your previous religious experiences, commitment or lack of commitment from your parents for a specific religion and its willingness to explore new ideas.
may seem a strange idea, what other brothers have said before and I say now Islamized myself: mostly should wait 6 months to a year to tell. The reasons for this vary: you need to more firmly in the practice of Islam, you need to make friends and create you a "support system" among members of the Muslim community.
This is because if your parents react to your Islamization trying to "deprogram" or arranging a "date" with the pastor, priest or local rabbi. So you can lean on your knowledge of the Koran and the strength it gives you longer a practicing Muslim. Give yourself
time to create a "system of care and support" within the Muslim community is important as well have friends to help and guide you, to help answer questions or concerns you may have your family and help you move out if your parents decide they can no longer live at home. If you fear that your family react to physical abuse or an attempt to "kidnapping and deprogramming" (yes, it happens!), Be sure to have someone there to witness and support. Regardless of whether you are Muslim or not, you have the right not to be abused. If your family is abused, seek the help needed to escape from this situation as soon as possible.
Another good reason to expect a little is to help your parents to realize the positive changes that Islam produces in you: more concerned about hygiene and grooming, more discipline in your daily activities and your schoolwork, the fact under pressure not to fall into alcoholism, drug addiction or fornication, your greatest desire to serve your parents helping at home, you more involved in your work (if you have one), etc. Give them a time to be pleased with these positive changes, so you can see that Islam is beneficial, not only for you but for everyone. If they see that Islam is good for you "they will react more positively when they talk about the subject.
For adults
As an adult, especially if you're independent or you are married, your parents and family are aware that you are empowered to make your own decisions. Some new Islamized
do not bother about how parents can react on this ground. Others, however, attach great importance to their families respect and accept his decision. This can be difficult, especially if children or a son hated involved.
An adult who chooses to be a Muslim must take into account some of the same considerations that have recently Islamized adolescents: What is your relationship with your family? What is your level of commitment to religion or lack thereof? What degree of commitment to any religion you had before? How is your family open to new ideas? For an adult, those considerations include: How do your parents feel about your partner? Do your parents have a history of making you feel obligated to them for favors they have done since you left home? How close are your parents to your children, if you have them?
Since most do not live with your parents will be easier to give them enough time and space so they can digest your ad. Be sure to explain emphatically that this do not change radically and you want to keep intact much your relationship with them.
sure they continue to have access to their grandchildren, but at the same time, let it clear you're not going to tolerate that teach anything outside of Islam or give them to eat things Haram (illegal) or to involve them Haram celebrations.
In some cases better than your Islamization communicate them to be alone, so you avoid blame your husband or wife or molest him. Make sure they know they have to deal with you directly.
Dealing with your brothers and sisters
Many of us have at least one brother, and it is important to deal with each brother individually. Are you still a teenager, this means talking with each of your older and younger brothers and let them do the questions they want about you. Let them know you're still the same person I used to argue who gets to wash the dishes and you're still your brother or sister. Emphasizes the fact that we still love them, especially if they are minor and too young to understand why you do not go to church. Above all, make sure you are acting as a good example both for your younger siblings to the elderly.
If you are an adult you have many chances you have some "issues pending between you and your brothers and probably not you talk to some. Also are more likely to be living all in different cities and states. In the case of your older brothers is better to write a letter or make a phone call where you can clearly explain your decision and answer all your questions. Get ready for some hard feelings that may emerge, particularly those related to incidents of children.
accuses them not to feel hurt, give them time to overcome any discomfort they may have, this may be something deeper than your choice to be Muslim. Reassure them that you're still the same brother or sister who likes to eat cheesecake or watch football games.
If you do not try any of your brothers is best to avoid communicating your decision all together, until they reach a mutual understanding as a family they are.
all Muslims A new
most important thing is do not let it drag you to a discussion of "Christianity vs. Islam "or" Judaism vs. Islam "or" Hinduism vs. Islam "or any other kind of religious debate with your parents or other relatives.
I know of several new Muslim whose parents or siblings belong to evangelical churches and activists have been harassed, tempted and convicted them. DO NOT ALLOW THEM TO crawl RELIGIOUS CONFLICT IN ANY WAY.
If any of your relatives judge you severely (for example, to tell you: "You are a worshiper of Satan and you will go to Hell!") will not respond in the same way! If your relationship apart from this religious difference, you can save, then avoid any religious discussion until everyone has the will to carry it out in a more tolerant and civilized.
The second suggestion is to not let yourself become a militant evangelist. Avoid aggressive and continuous attempts to convert members of your family, as this will only bring resentment and distance between you. The call to Islam should be called gentle, and the best way to do Da'wah to your family is that you yourself become a living example of Islam. If they are harassed, people are extremely stubborn when confronted and not give in to anything. You do not provoke tension between you and your family.
Finally, do not be demoralized and upset by the anti-Islamic and Islamophobic comments that your parents or relatives you can do. Many Americans know of Islam only through the news and movies like "Not without my daughter." Do not get assaulted with nicknames like "terrorist" or "abuser of women," and do not answer you by your side accusing the "Zionists" or "hypocrites", etc. Instead to do this, rather gently tries to correct any misconceptions they have of Islam and Muslims. If you are a woman, tries to explain assuring that Islam gives you your rights and speak of your commitment to wear Islamic dress.
If they have genuine concern for your safety as a Muslim woman, tries to make a visit to the mosque and the Imam's appointment or to arrange a meeting for coffee with some other Muslim sisters
is perhaps the hardest thing to do as a Muslim to touch you again. For many people it is a possibility of opening old wounds, risk of hurting the feelings of both sides and threatening to destroy family relationships.
For others not, because they know they will be accepted by their parents, brothers and other family members unconditionally. Ma Sha Allah. For Teens
my advice will be different from that adults give to independent and even married. In Sha Allah we will first case of young people who still live with their parents.
Tips for Teens
Often, this is a case to be treated with care. We can not offer any precise statement, as the way you treat your family to this issue depends on several factors: your age, your community, your relationship with your family, your previous religious experiences, commitment or lack of commitment from your parents for a specific religion and its willingness to explore new ideas.
may seem a strange idea, what other brothers have said before and I say now Islamized myself: mostly should wait 6 months to a year to tell. The reasons for this vary: you need to more firmly in the practice of Islam, you need to make friends and create you a "support system" among members of the Muslim community.
This is because if your parents react to your Islamization trying to "deprogram" or arranging a "date" with the pastor, priest or local rabbi. So you can lean on your knowledge of the Koran and the strength it gives you longer a practicing Muslim. Give yourself
time to create a "system of care and support" within the Muslim community is important as well have friends to help and guide you, to help answer questions or concerns you may have your family and help you move out if your parents decide they can no longer live at home. If you fear that your family react to physical abuse or an attempt to "kidnapping and deprogramming" (yes, it happens!), Be sure to have someone there to witness and support. Regardless of whether you are Muslim or not, you have the right not to be abused. If your family is abused, seek the help needed to escape from this situation as soon as possible.
Another good reason to expect a little is to help your parents to realize the positive changes that Islam produces in you: more concerned about hygiene and grooming, more discipline in your daily activities and your schoolwork, the fact under pressure not to fall into alcoholism, drug addiction or fornication, your greatest desire to serve your parents helping at home, you more involved in your work (if you have one), etc. Give them a time to be pleased with these positive changes, so you can see that Islam is beneficial, not only for you but for everyone. If they see that Islam is good for you "they will react more positively when they talk about the subject.
For adults
As an adult, especially if you're independent or you are married, your parents and family are aware that you are empowered to make your own decisions. Some new Islamized
do not bother about how parents can react on this ground. Others, however, attach great importance to their families respect and accept his decision. This can be difficult, especially if children or a son hated involved.
An adult who chooses to be a Muslim must take into account some of the same considerations that have recently Islamized adolescents: What is your relationship with your family? What is your level of commitment to religion or lack thereof? What degree of commitment to any religion you had before? How is your family open to new ideas? For an adult, those considerations include: How do your parents feel about your partner? Do your parents have a history of making you feel obligated to them for favors they have done since you left home? How close are your parents to your children, if you have them?
Since most do not live with your parents will be easier to give them enough time and space so they can digest your ad. Be sure to explain emphatically that this do not change radically and you want to keep intact much your relationship with them.
sure they continue to have access to their grandchildren, but at the same time, let it clear you're not going to tolerate that teach anything outside of Islam or give them to eat things Haram (illegal) or to involve them Haram celebrations.
In some cases better than your Islamization communicate them to be alone, so you avoid blame your husband or wife or molest him. Make sure they know they have to deal with you directly.
Dealing with your brothers and sisters
Many of us have at least one brother, and it is important to deal with each brother individually. Are you still a teenager, this means talking with each of your older and younger brothers and let them do the questions they want about you. Let them know you're still the same person I used to argue who gets to wash the dishes and you're still your brother or sister. Emphasizes the fact that we still love them, especially if they are minor and too young to understand why you do not go to church. Above all, make sure you are acting as a good example both for your younger siblings to the elderly.
If you are an adult you have many chances you have some "issues pending between you and your brothers and probably not you talk to some. Also are more likely to be living all in different cities and states. In the case of your older brothers is better to write a letter or make a phone call where you can clearly explain your decision and answer all your questions. Get ready for some hard feelings that may emerge, particularly those related to incidents of children.
accuses them not to feel hurt, give them time to overcome any discomfort they may have, this may be something deeper than your choice to be Muslim. Reassure them that you're still the same brother or sister who likes to eat cheesecake or watch football games.
If you do not try any of your brothers is best to avoid communicating your decision all together, until they reach a mutual understanding as a family they are.
all Muslims A new
most important thing is do not let it drag you to a discussion of "Christianity vs. Islam "or" Judaism vs. Islam "or" Hinduism vs. Islam "or any other kind of religious debate with your parents or other relatives.
I know of several new Muslim whose parents or siblings belong to evangelical churches and activists have been harassed, tempted and convicted them. DO NOT ALLOW THEM TO crawl RELIGIOUS CONFLICT IN ANY WAY.
If any of your relatives judge you severely (for example, to tell you: "You are a worshiper of Satan and you will go to Hell!") will not respond in the same way! If your relationship apart from this religious difference, you can save, then avoid any religious discussion until everyone has the will to carry it out in a more tolerant and civilized.
The second suggestion is to not let yourself become a militant evangelist. Avoid aggressive and continuous attempts to convert members of your family, as this will only bring resentment and distance between you. The call to Islam should be called gentle, and the best way to do Da'wah to your family is that you yourself become a living example of Islam. If they are harassed, people are extremely stubborn when confronted and not give in to anything. You do not provoke tension between you and your family.
Finally, do not be demoralized and upset by the anti-Islamic and Islamophobic comments that your parents or relatives you can do. Many Americans know of Islam only through the news and movies like "Not without my daughter." Do not get assaulted with nicknames like "terrorist" or "abuser of women," and do not answer you by your side accusing the "Zionists" or "hypocrites", etc. Instead to do this, rather gently tries to correct any misconceptions they have of Islam and Muslims. If you are a woman, tries to explain assuring that Islam gives you your rights and speak of your commitment to wear Islamic dress.
If they have genuine concern for your safety as a Muslim woman, tries to make a visit to the mosque and the Imam's appointment or to arrange a meeting for coffee with some other Muslim sisters
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